How does parents influence shape you as a person

This assignment is a report from a individual interview that I did on – how does parents influence shape an individual as a person?

Paper requirent: A 5 page full apa paper.

1. 1 and half page of : A brief rationale/explanation of the topic that I chose: (how does parents influence shape an individual as a person?)

2. 1 and half page of a clear description of themes and what they mean

3. an explanation of the relevance of these themes to your research question (i.e. why did you choose these themes; ~1 page)

4. one (1) broad conclusion about your findings (~1 paragraph).

I attached the transcript of the interview below: 

0:02 S Speaker 2 

thank you for doing this interview for, and hope you’re having a good day. 

0:10 S Speaker 1 

Thank you so much for having me. Yes, I’m having a great day. 

0:15 S Speaker 2 

Okay, great. So I’m gonna start with my interview. So the, so we are talking about attachment theory in this interview, so my first question is, how close or attached are you to both of your parents or family? 

0:33 S Speaker 1 

Um, I find myself closer to my mom than my dad. My dad has been, uh, emotionally distant ever since I was a child. It’s not that it’s his fault, that’s just how his personality is. Um, I definitely feel closer to my mother growing up, but I feel that my father has been a huge backbone in my family, and it’s because of the sacrifices that he has made when I was a child that I’m the person that I am today. It’s only because of his financial support that, um, I was able to come all the way to Canada and pursue my higher education over here. 

1:11 S Speaker 2 

Nice. Um, so with the second question, growing up, did you feel your parents were strict and if you feel, if they were strict, to what extent they were strict? 

1:25 S Speaker 1

 Um, both my parents were never strict. The reason is because, um, I’ve never abused my freedom. My parents have always given me the freedom to do whatever I wanted because they knew that I would never go against their desires or against their wishes. Um, anytime I misbehaved or if I did something wrong, they would always correct me. Um, but they’ve always given me the freedom to do, um, whatever I want, all the good things in moderation. 

1:54 S Speaker 2 

Great. So the next question is, how is the relationship between your parents as partners in between your parents? 

2:03 S Speaker 1 

Um, both my parents are equals in their marriage. Uh, they don’t need to consult each other when they make small decisions, but whenever they have to make big decisions, I’ve always seen them sit together collectively and discuss what options work best for them. Uh, both my parents communicate very well with each other. They’re able to understand each other’s emotions and feelings. Um, my parents have always had a very understanding relationship. There have never been fights in the house. There have never been any disagreements or arguments that have ever happened. I don’t recall a time when I had to make a choice between which parent was right and which parent was wrong, because both my parents are always on the same page. The one thing that I really appreciate about them is that they both share similar principles and values in life, um, because of which they’ve had a very smooth marriage. And that’s actually given me an insight into what I expect, uh, in the near future when I get married and when I become a parent myself. 

3:07 S Speaker 2 

That’s good to, I’m glad. So, yeah. Um, have you ever been inspired or physically abused as a child by your parents? 

3:17 S Speaker 1 

Um, I consider myself to be very fortunate when I say that I was never physically abused. Um, there were times whenever I was speaking, my mother used to spank me or she used to hit me. Um, but it was never an extreme form of punishment. She probably just give me a smack on my shoulder on my back. Um, my father has never raised his voice against me. Um, I don’t recall any incidents where there’s ever been any physical abuse or ever been hit, um, in, um, a horrendous way. But my parents, there’s always been a lot of love and respect between them in between me. Um, so no, I don’t recall any time where I’ve ever been physically abused as a child. 

4:00 S Speaker 2 

Great. Okay. So, uh, so knowing you, you’re my friends, so I know you for a long time. So, uh, I consider you as religious. And so my next question is, have your parents ever forced you in terms of religious beliefs? 

4:17 S Speaker 1 

Um, my parents never forced me to practice by religious beliefs. I have the freedom to choose whatever I want. Um, the reason why I am a religious person is because I’ve had a very strong foundation in my religious beliefs ever since I was a child. Both my parents were raised in very God fearing households, and religion was given a lot of importance. I remember, um, going to church every Sunday and attending catechism classes over the weekend. Um, we would always pray, uh, the rosary, which is a prayer that is prayed by Christians. Um, and we would always make sure to keep God in the center of our lives. Um, I was never forced to practice my religious beliefs and it was never a compulsion or an obligation for me to follow in their footsteps. I am a religious person because I personally made the choice to be a religious person. Um, so I don’t think my parents have ever forced me into it. 

5:18 S Speaker 2 

Nice. So my next question is, growing up, what did you, uh, what did your parents teach about gender roles or did you learn anything from them?

 5:28 S Speaker 1 

The one thing that I learned about gender roles is that, um, there are no such things as masculine or feminine, um, jobs or work or there’s no particular jobs that are, that have to have gender roles assigned to them. Um, for example, when my mother used to work on Saturdays when she used to work six days a week, my father would do the cooking. Um, and he never shied away from cooking. There was never, um, that stereotype that only women were supposed to be in the kitchen. And I remember my father would wake up early in the morning sometimes to prepare breakfast or to heat up milk or juice for my brother and I to, um, drink in the morning before going to school. And if my mother was busy, my dad would sometimes wait down at the bus stop for me. Uh, so I, he would make sure that I would get safely, um, onto the bus whenever I was feeling sick or feeling ill. 

My mother was not around. My father would always be there, um, to protect me. Um, as far as gender roles were concerned, there was never, um, the idea that only men are allowed to drive because my mother has a driver’s license and the culture that I come from, a lot of women are not given the liberation of the freedom to drive, but I feel grateful that both my parents have their own separate cars and they are allowed to drive. Um, another important thing is that both my parents are working and a lot of cultures, women, um, are expected to take care of their household duties and responsibilities. Um, but my mother was able to handle both motherhood and she was also able to, um, handle her job extremely well. Um, I learned a lot from my parents growing up. I learned that, um, there is no such thing as, uh, uh, emasculating role or a feminine role or a masculine role, that all roles are equal and, um, you know, men and women should be respected. There is no such thing as gender stereotypes. 

7:30 S Speaker 2 

Great. So my next question is, what do you think is your attachment style? Knowing there are poor attachments, time to secure a and is’ and disorganized, uh, what do you think your kinda of attachment style is and um, how did that influence in being attached to your friends or like, uh, people than your family? 

7:58 S Speaker 1 

Um, I would say that my parents and I have a very secure attachment style. My parents have always given me the freedom to discuss anything. Um, there is no shame or embarrassment talking about sensitive topics such as sex, drugs, alcohol. Um, there’s never been, um, any shame that has been associated with talking about private matters. We’ve always had a very open communication. I never felt that I had to hide anything from my parents because they were always very understanding. Um, and I never had to feel that I had to lie to them about anything serious because I knew that they were always by my side no matter what, and they were always there to support me. Um, as far as my friends are concerned, um, I don’t have a secure attachment style. I have a more anxious attachment style, but that has got nothing to do with the relationship I have with my parents. 

It’s got to do with, um, the anxiety that I’m currently dealing with at the moment. It’s my social anxiety. I was diagnosed with, um, back in 2021. There was a year after the pandemic and I was seeing a psychotherapist. Um, the thing about me is that I find extremely hard to make friends and to keep friends in my life. Um, I take time to warm up to people and a lot of people say that I can be extremely formal, um, which is not something that I’m putting on. That’s just how I am as a person. Um, but it takes a lot of time for me to genuinely trust another person. One of my closest friends, um, I met him back in the year 2017, and it’s only recently when we have become extremely close that we can joke around, laugh, and have fun. Um, and I can, I think my attachment style depends on who I’m speaking to or who I’m talking to. I don’t have one particular attachment style for all the people in my life. It depends on who the person is.      

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